Monday, December 29, 2014

Another year came and went...

Yeah... 2014 almost end and 2015 is catching up... and in 2015 i'll be forty.. yeappp big Four Ohhh!! Dont get me started on my midlife crisis nonsense crap talk.. hahaha... instead let talk about how this year went...

hmmmm.... 2014.. the good and bad... 

I ended my non fruitful relationship... dont really know how to describe it.. I just end it.. no drama.. no whyy ohh whyyy this happen.. not even a single tear drop from my eye. maybe it was meant to be. maybe i stopped loving him long time ago.. just didnt have the guts to walk away.. Well now that i did im not looking back. i felt good.

Family wise.. mom still like mom.. her condition worsen... yeah.. it does hurt to see mom like that.. and sometimes remembering the things she did to me.. it makes me think.. what have i done to deserve this.. im tired.. of all the test and challenge HE sets for me.. Sometimes i just wish for a break from all this.. i just wanna be happy with my life.. i want my life to be easy and simple.. no drama.. everything just go my way.. like for once.. can HE just give me what i want.. without all the drama...

Dad... he's a good dad/husband. He's taking care of mom... and every now and then blow his steam off at me.. then suddenly that makes me feel like im a teenager again. With all the pressure and what now.

Often people always tell me to let go.. tell me dont think about it.. dont talk about it.. so i did.. but that thing didnt go away.. i just buried them deep in my heart.. and when im alone.. that feelings resurface.. and yes im sad and depressed. and yes i do feel lonely. and yes.. yes.. yes.. its not a pretty picture and yes its hard on me still... and yes i do everything i can to handle it. and yes im being strong. yes... i hide it from everyone.. i smiled i laughed.. to the extend people think there's nothing wrong with me.. well i've been pretending.. faking a smile when im feeling down.. and i guess im good at it.. cause no one notice that im sad and hurting... and i just dont talk about it.. coz no one want to talk about it with me. well no worries.. i got it covered.. im coping.. i hope.. 

relative wise.. as far as im concerned.. none exist. heh

work wise.. im grateful.. im still employed.

Friend wise.. im grateful.. that i have few dependable friends... good friends.. best buddies.. maybe handful.. but im ok with it.

love life wise.... :) Thank you

Pray and hope 2015 will be a better year for me.. fruitful year.. smooth sailing.. all the best in everything.. chaiyok!! 


   

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Busy.. as always


Im not going to start with how busy i am lately.. and how fast time flies and how im tired and i have not get enough rest and how bad my boss treats me so on and so forth... Im not trying to be grumpy.. heh...

Instead... Im going to tell you.. I miss my camera... my photography session.. my just lets walk and get lost and just shoot anything interesting time... I think im having the wanderlust crave

 

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Me = Bipolar
























Friday, June 27, 2014

If I Fell - Maroon 5



If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true
And help me understand
Cos I've been in love before
And I found that love was more
Than just holding hands

If I give my heart to you
I must be sure
From the very start
That you would love me more than her

If I trust in you oh please
Don't run and hide
If I love you too oh please
Don't hurt my pride like her
Cos I couldn't stand the pain
And I would be sad if our new love was in vain

So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two
Cos I couldn't stand the pain
And I would be sad if our new love was in vain

So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two



Bucket list plan with my Partner ♥♥♥


List of things that I wanna do with my partner whenever we have the time... 


  • Lay down and watch the clouds pass by at Langley Park, Perth



  • Spend time to be exact the whole day at Kings Park, Perth admiring the view and picnic and drinking coffee or tea or juice and eating sandwiches or pastry, read, talk and me taking photos, while waiting for the sun to set in the evening


  • Travel to Turkey.....




  • Spend a month at least in Europe.. do almost everything that we love there



  • Caravanning across Australia




  • Watch movies, tv series... (special list for this one)





  • Visit the Louvre and pretend that we fancy art.. and criticising and analysing all the great paintings.. the brush stroke, the era... the message behind the paintings... 



  • Spend the whole day in an old Library 





  • Spend 1 week in a "floating" chalet by the sea / river / jungle doing nothing.. relaxing... enjoying the tranquillity... Just bond



That's it for now... hehehehe






    Thursday, June 19, 2014

    Who you Love - John Mayer ft Katy Perry

    You love, who you love
    Who you love
    You love, who you love
    Who you love

    My girl, she ain't the one that I saw coming
    And sometimes I don't know which way to go
    And I tried to run before
    But I'm not running anymore
    Cause I've fought against it hard enough to know

    That you love, who you love
    Who you love
    You love, who you love
    Who you love
    You love, who you love
    Who you love

    Oh, you can't make yourself stop dreaming
    Who you're dreaming of
    If it's who you love
    Then it's who you love

    My boy, he ain't the one that I saw coming
    And some have said his heart's too hot to hold
    And it takes a little time
    But you should see him when he shines
    Cause you never wanna let that feeling go

    When you love, who you love
    Who you love
    You love, who you love
    Who you love
    Yeah, you love, who you love
    Who you love

    Oh, you can't make yourself stop dreaming
    Who you're dreaming of
    If it's who you love
    Then it's who you love

    Oh, you love, who you love
    Who you love
    You love, who you love
    Who you love
    You love, who you love
    Who you love

    Oh, you can't make yourself stop dreaming
    Who you're dreaming of
    If it's who you love
    Then it's who you love

    It's who you love
    Who you love
    Who you love
    Who you love
    You're the one I love


    Friday, June 13, 2014

    Have i told you lately



    Have I told you lately that I love you
    Have I told you there's no one else above you
    You fill my heart with gladness
    Take away all my sadness
    Ease my troubles, that's what you do

    For the morning sun and all it's glory
    Greets the day with hope and comfort, too
    You fill my heart with laughter
    Somehow, you make it better
    Ease my troubles, that's what you do

    There's a love that's divine
    And it's yours and it's mine
    Like the sun
    And at the end of the day
    We should give thanks and pray
    To the one, to the one

    Have I told you lately that I love you
    Have I told you there's no one else above you
    You fill my heart with gladness
    Take away all my sadness
    Ease my troubles, that's what you do

    There's a love that's divine
    And it's yours and it's mine
    Like the sun
    And at the end of the day
    We should give thanks and pray
    To the one, to the one

    Have I told you lately that I love you
    Have I told you there's no one else above you
    You fill my heart with gladness
    Take away all my sadness
    Ease my troubles, that's what you do

    Take away my sadness, fill my life with gladness
    Ease my troubles, that's what you do

    Take away my sadness, fill my life with gladness
    Ease my troubles, that's what you do